--Tina Fey"If God's got anything better than sex to offer, he's certainly keeping it to himself".--Sting"It isn't premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married".--George Burns"We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation".--Lily Tomlin"My boyfriend and I live together, which means we don't have sex—ever. Now that the milk is free, we've both become lactose intolerant". --Margaret Cho"My wife is a sex object - every time I ask for sex, she objects".--Les Dawson"Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship".--Sharon Stone"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time".--Robin Williams"I want to tell you a terrific story about oral contraception. I asked this girl to sleep with me and she said 'No'".--Woody Allen"Erotica is using a feather; pornography is using the whole chicken".--Isabel Allende"You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school. We were a bad role model.Well in truth, that is a bunch of bullshit. Bullshit, to the extent that it is her fault. She is right that they never seemed to argue, but that is because they both respected each other and because as much as he chose not to exercise his authority, we all knew he had it. He had the final say, if one was needed. It just never seemed to be needed.What came next isn't bullshit, it is just plain crazy.She says: Go find a girl. Look overseas. Find a girl who will give you children.I look at her. She is nuts. I probably say as much.She insists that I am not too old and that other men have done it. Finally she says that if I go to meet a girl, she will help pay for the trip. She can afford it (as can I) but it is sort of a 'double dog dare you' type of thing.Before I put her back on a plane to go home I am looking at Asian dating websites. I post my profile on a couple of them. One of them is a loser and nothing comes of it. The other comes alive in a way I cannot.
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